You Got a Friend in Me

It has come to my attention that my friend count since January 2008 has significantly decreased over the year. Perhaps this is due to a new curmudgeon-have-no-patience-for-annoying-people complex I’ve developed, or perhaps this was just a long time coming.

In general it has been hard to meet new people. Despite my recent efforts, I have been unsuccessful in transitioning co-workers to friend status. Below, an excerpt:

Al: When did you start working here?

Co-worker/potential friend: July 2007

Al: Ok, would you say we became acquainted in 2007 or 2008?

Co-worker/potential friend: What kind of form are you filling out?

Co-worker/potential friend: um…

Earlier this month the greater powers tried to take away a friend by causing his lung to collapse. Ironically, this was my new year’s greeting to him in early January:

Date: January 4, 2008

Subject: A picture for you

Hi Cuong,

Happy New Year! I hope your lung doesn’t collapse this year.

Love,

Al

He survived and thus no replacement friend was needed. Facebook says I have 130 friends, it actually could have been 131. Sadly the person that friend requested me was looking for another Al. He quickly rescinded the offer. I feel like we could have been friends if he had just tried to get to know me.

I guess what they say is true, quality NOT quantity. So fine, I may be down, but I’m not out. For example, in the 1^st grade I had a best friend named Kathleen. We would hang out after school and have lots of fun. The only thing was she would never share her Chinese rice crackers with me. Or if she did, it would be like a crumb. This always saddened me. Needless to say I dropped that bitch and moved on to a new crew in the 2^nd grade. Also, my mom found where they sold the Chinese rice crackers and thus I lived a bountiful existence. Crackers for everyone! It was pretty much up hill after that. We’re talking friendship bracelets, a yearbook chockfull of “KIT” and “stay cool,” and of course grand declarations of Friends 4EVA. Quality friends = anyone but Kathleen.

If at any point I feel sad again about my friendship status. I will remember my brother’s wise words to me:

dude, you have hella friends now. Good job =]